Are you comfortable with me?

Are you comfortable with me?
Do you feel alright when you’re here with me? Do I make you feel okay? I mean, don’t you feel a little bit trembling when you’re next to me? Because I do. Whenever I close to you, I’m not okay. My heart beats faster. I can’t breathe like I used to. I don’t feel alright. Everything is a mess.

Are you comfortable with me?
Do you feel alright when you’re asking me about how’s my day? Do you feel totally fine when you’re asking me what am i doing? Don’t you feel a little bit burdened to ask me? Wondering if I’m busy with my work or don’t feel like to reply your messages.. Because I do. Sending messages to you is like doing something that can risk my life. I’m totally scared. “Will you be okay if I send you messages at night? Will you reply my messages?” A lot of thoughts like that come to my mind, almost every night.

Because I really want to know everything about you. I want to know your favorite songs, your favorite colors, your favorite books, your favorite scents, and your favorite numbers. Because you’re my favorite. You’re my number 1.
But…
Again, I’m not comfortable with you. I can’t think straight whenever I think of you.

Are you comfortable with me?

If that so, honestly I don’t want to.